Thursday, October 29, 2015

1 month

Today was a truly lovely day; no complaints. 

I slept in a whole hour and then crawled out of bed into a bright, cool, beautiful autumn day. My hair was tousled and I had a pimple beside my nose, but guess what...

I gave less than two shits. 

Today was my day off (!!!) and I had no reason to look good for anyone. No school. No work. No grocery shopping. No laundry. AND (!!!) the dishes were done. *HUGE SMILE*

I studied some school stuff lazily while watching a bit of TV and drinking my coffee. Mr. Darcy 

(as shown below)

was chewing on my notes beside me and making me crazy. The fan was on low by the window making my feet cold which is pleasantly uncomfortable. 

Chris (^^^the guy up there^^^) came home early came home from work and we went to the theatre (insert British accent) and saw The Last Witch Hunter which was a pretty decent Vin Diesel movie. We came home and I made some dinner. I sat back down to my notes and bad TV and Chris got on WoW. 

Seriously, a lovely day!

Well, then Chris went to bed. I was starting to get frustrated with some awful astronomy notes. So I went to Wal-Mart. I was wearing these exact same sweatpants, but I think I wore them better.

I grabbed my usual sugar-free chocolates and wandered the store while eating them.
I paid for my empty package.
Then I went to get some tea.
This is a picture of DAVIDsTEA...with a really awkward David.

I grabbed a mint tea because I just scarfed down an entire package of sugar free chocolates. In case you have never had sugar free chocolate, there is a disclaimer on the bag saying it can have laxative-like effects. 


wandering the mall with my mint tea and a package of salad for later, I decided to take a quick trip into Urban Outfitters*. Today was its grand opening and since the mall was closing in 15 minutes I figured I could wander a few minutes and not have to deal with a swarm of people. Whilst wandering, I came across a few things:

-cassette player (remind me to tell you a story about that later)
-flasks disguised as tampons
-those ugly socks from when I was little that went up to your knee and had those awful red and/or blue stripes
-a Christmas sweater with the words "Merry Christmas You Filthy Animal" (you may remember this as one of the Home Alone scenes)

A guy who was no older than 20 picked up the sweater and laughed. He discussed buying it with a young lady who I can only assume was his girlfriend. Judging from that discussion, neither of them had a clue about the origin of this phrase.

This was the beginning...

I suddenly felt old. This is not the first time I have felt old, and probably not the last. The difference this time is I suddenly started giggling and I couldn't stop. I was overwhelmed. It was like that feeling you get as a child when you have just discovered a secret and you feel so excited because you know something no one else does. Simultaneously, however, I felt a weight. I felt a heavy discomfort that I could only describe as an intense feeling of nostalgia for something that I couldn't quite grasp.

I left the store and thought...

Wait! What day is it!?

I picked up my phone and looked at the date.

October 29.

Precisely one month before my birthday. My thirtieth birthday.

I grabbed my chocolate and I blew that popsicle stand.

Arriving home I still had this feeling and couldn't get rid of that ridiculous grin.

Here's the point I'm trying to make:

Thirty is a big deal. People keep telling me it isn't, but it is. Thirty is the age when you finally feel a detachment from your childhood. Now, this isn't necessarily a bad thing and I can't say I'm sad about it, but it is a big deal. I feel utterly cut-off from this current generation of hipsters and LGBTQ* activists. I feel kind of irrelevant. 


The amazing thing about realizing your irrelevance is that you finally feel free from all of those AWFUL cultural/societal constraints. I didn't care that I was at the mall in sweatpants and I didn't care that I had a pimple the size of Belarus on my face. I didn't care that I don't have a pair D & G glasses.

So, here I am...

High as a kite and praising myself for the foresight to buy that salad and chocolate.

High as a kite and pondering my new-found freedom.

High as a kite and apparently starting a blog...

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